Thank you Bardarbunga!

Children holidaying from Britain across the azure blue shores of the Mediterranean and beyond will right now be contemplating the closing weeks of the summer holidays. As the skies darken over their little lives with the prospect of going back to Form 5B, hope and help is at hand in the form of Bardarbunga.  No, not a Harry Potter character but an angry volcano in Iceland. Oh and boy is it getting angry and potentially, it could create dark skies for real as we've previously seen, and yes, we're usually quick off the mark with the volcano thing here at Crumble HQ..

Iceland has this afternoon warned airlines that there may be an eruption at Bardabunga which is located underneath Vatnajokull, Europe’s biggest glacier.

The alert level at Bardarbunga was today raised to “orange,” indicating “heightened or escalating unrest with increased potential of eruption,” the Reykjavik-based Met Office said.

Over 250 tremors have been measured in the area since midnight. The agency said there are still no visible indications of an eruption..... yet

The volcano is 25 kilometers (15.5 miles) wide and rises about 1,900 meters above sea level. So, it’s a biggie.

You can read more here and here there is a world of resource here and here.

British kids, obviously quick of the mark, will be going to uncommonly great lengths to avoid letting their parents see news reports, listen to the radio, read the papers..... "no Dad, you need to rest and get away from the news," lest Dad gets a flap on, hires a car and drives back before all flights are cancelled and all ferries are booked.

Obviously, I don't want 15 miles of Iceland to erupt as little as does the next man, but the kids... I know what they're thinking and it very much reminds me of this scene from John Boorman's wonderful film, Hope & Glory.

"There may well be sand in the engine..." (old AA advert)


New Dust-Safe Jet Aircraft Come into Service With The RAF

Just for once, I find myself on the side of the barricade with HMG and the bloody Met Office. I can't quite believe it but sure enough, there are other people out there even more stupid than the Government.

I know it's a bit dull know, given everyone has an attention span that lasts just long enough until the next pretty girl walks past but the hammed up outrage of the press over the flight ban is not only misplaced and misguided, it's pathetic.

Moreover, to hear the Teresa Villiers, apparently the Shadow Transport Secretary, asking for an enquiry just leaves me fvcking bereft about the chances of the Tories forming a government. Why do you want an enquiry? So a bunch of people can put a load of facts on paper so you can learn what you're job is supposed to be? Listen you cloth eared bint; aeroplanes without engines don't fly, they just drop to the ground in a stomach churning and terror ridden last few minutes. It's a horrible way to die. Any last chance survivors will be burnt to a crisp on impact and guess what - no one; absolutely no one walks away.

This is the thing, you don't fvck around with aircraft safety... thats why every turn of every screw on every aircraft is logged and recorded. The ash is thinner now than it has been but the volcano is still blowing the stuff out. 

 I think the gov has done exactly the right thing and I couldn't care less about chavs stuck in Spain or Camilla & Ranald from Godalming stuck in their Alpine chalet. They're all too stupid and self important to have any sense of their own mortality. If I had my way I would stand down the aircraft again at a moments notice and apologise to no one.

As for that Irish midget muppet Walsh, I'd arrest him for sending 36 aircraft to the UK on Tuesday when the airspace was shut and stick him in a cell with a 6'5'' bloke called Leroy who was feeling a little lonely. Who in the flying fvck does he think he is, making up the rules as he goes along? For good measure, I'd jam that irritating sod O'Leary from Ryan Air in the cell with him and give Leroy a real treat. I'm fed up with all the crying and wailing over some minor inconvenience. It's no more than happens every year with French air traffic control strikes or strikes at BA for that matter.

Can things be done better, for sure; the WSJ points out today how Alaskan Airways operate with dust clouds. Even though they have pretty refined systems however, they still have pretty rigid rules about when to fly and when not.

Now we discover the RAF has canned training flights in Lincolnshire because of dust found in fast jet engines. So, who am I going to listen to, some rent-a-quote career wannabe politician and Walsh, or the RAF?