The Dating Game

Like just about everything else, this too has changed.

Talking to the son of a friend the other day, (Crumble Kids wouldn't step near the subject with their father), it seems that the days of boys heading out for an adventurous evening in search of romance have been consigned to the dustbin. Most, if not all assignations now are apparently pre organised on Facebook. That's bad enough but whats worse is the prospective partner will go data mining and in about five minutes have enough material at hand, to make a snap decision as to whether a first date is a go or not.

That's sad because it would invalidate just about all the schemes I came up with to draw myself to the attention of young ladies, mind you, they were pretty rubbish schemes anyway.

The "wander round the Tate gallery looking interesting on a Sunday afternoon," was a total waste of time and which anyway, ended up round the corner in the Cross Keys over a reflective five pints. The landlord, Arthur, at least thought I was interesting. Nor was the "if I splash that girl then jump out of the car, apologise and offer her a lift," a very well thought out gambit. The bodywork repair bill resulting from an angry umbrella wielding lunatic was well outside my contingency planning. 

I wouldn't profess to ever have been a graduate of the Grant-Niven School of Charm but we did have fun. Moreover, the learning about one another over weeks and months, the likes, the dislikes, the moods, the experiences, the disasters was interesting and it kept you on your toes. Having the whole thing compressed into a few bytes of binary and read, absorbed and possibly discarded within a few minutes is I think, somewhat disheartening. 

oh do just fuck off Simpson, supercilious sod

From the users perspective of course, they see it as an opportunity to filter through a much larger catchment, waste less time and optimise their hits. I just think it's bloody sad but the saddest part is anyone not on Facebook is likely to be regarded at first glance a weird person so therefore, anyway fails the first test.

As if all that nonsense wasn't bad enough the earth truly goes spinning off it's axis when we learn from a Martha de Lacey that a "speed dating app is more addictive than crack."  Well Miss de Lacey, I haven't tried either and regard both with equal suspicion. Apparently, you download an app called Tinder, and it discovers other single's within a few minutes of you. The user selects one, pings them and if they accept, having run through the profile, you hook up within a few minutes. 

Miss de Lacey is taking a robust and industrial approach to Tinder having started conversations with 40 men up to the time her article was published. I just think it's sad. Get a life Martha and try the Tate Gallery on Sunday, there might be another chap wandering around looking for a vision to waft in before him. Who knows what you might be missing with your digital guillotine.